I’m Your Desire Fulfillment Facilitator!

By Nicole Izmaylov 

Hands up. Who remembered the quote—and where it came from?

You have four choices:

a)      Inception

b)      New Moon

c)       The Last Airbender

d)      Wakko’s Wish

If you guessed “d,” you’re correct!

Okay. Hands up again. Now who remembers what Wakko’s Wish is?

Welcome to A Quick Timeline of Kiddy Cartoons, from the “golden age” to today.

Sadly, the “golden age” of kids’ cartoons has left us. I can’t say I was there during most of the golden age. After all, I was born in 1997. However, I do remember what I did see.

Every Saturday morning, I would wake up at six o’clock, running as fast as I could to the television, moving into a comfortable position, grabbing my bowl of Cheerios, pressing the remote, and gluing myself to a world of animated violence, talking animals, and nonsensical flibber-flabber.

Today’s cartoons lack something. Something . . . crazy. The “cartoon show of yore” focused on every episode a shining jewel, and the non-sequiturs and plot holes somehow made it funnier. Take a staple: Tom and Jerry. Who cared if the episodes have little or nothing to do with each other? I distinctly remember the unbelievably cute cry of the little gray mouse from the parody of the Three Musketeers as he squealed, “Monsieur Pussycat!” The violence of the cartoons, such as in the end of that particular episode, in which Tom, the cat, is executed off-screen, was subdued by the cartoons’ hilarity. Most cartoons also managed to attract both younger children and adult audiences, using double entendre or (often thinly) veiled jokes.

There were shows like Dexter’s Laboratory, Ed Edd n Eddy, and Rocko’s Modern Life. My mother often wistfully says that she wishes they still ran those cartoons. Occasionally, one does see reruns, but somehow they’re been all but forgotten. Shows like Cow and Chicken, Johnny Bravo, and CatDog though premiering at different times, entranced many in their promises of sidesplitting, fantastical gobbledygook, each moment funnier than the last. Though they premiered long ago, I still remember them fondly.

Moving right along. Remember the “friendly kid shows?” I’m not talking about Dora the Explora. I’m talking about the “friendly” ones. Shows like Arthur (thankfully still on!) and Rolie Polie Olie excited the imagination and gave valuable lessons. There were also music shows like The Wiggles. Who here remembers PB&J Otter and Franklin? Sadly, few do. The memories have all been blown away by the evil corporate demons trying to make money.

The next three things to hit big were the “animated action-comedy show,” the “old show that had survived,” and the “CGI show.” Shows like The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy, originally little shorts, survived. The animated action-comedy show, such as Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends and Camp Lazlo as well as ChalkZone and Catscratch took over cartoony broadcasting, at least for the time being. These slowly morphed into more “surreal” cartoons like Chowder and The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack. The CGI show, unfortunately still around, was perhaps a harbinger of the future. Then there was Codename: Kids Next Door, which, interestingly, is the kids’ cartoon show with the most episodes produced on Cartoon Network, at eighty-one.

This next category covers a great span of time. There were the “actual action” action shows. This included anime from Japan (which is defined as “a Japanese style of animated cartoon, often with violent or explicit content”) such as YuYu Hakusho and Pokémon, traditionally American animated plot-based stories like Samurai Jack and later Teen Titans and Ben 10, “dramatic” series like Animorphs and Are You Afraid of the Dark?, slightly more serious “animated emphasis-on-action-comedy show,” such as Danny Phantom. Also in this “barrel” is the highly acclaimed Avatar: The Last Airbender (also known as Avatar: The Legend of Aang), which according to several surveys has generally come to be called, amongst some demographics, “the last good show on Nick.” The celebrated programming block Toonami fits right in here.

And then there are the shows of today.

While a few good ones are still around—for example, Cartoon Network is showing reruns—most of the new shows on previously kiddy networks are either completely surreal nonsense or just plain live-action. Where are my beautiful cartoons?!

What do you guys think? What were your favorite “oldie” cartoons and why, and do you like any of the new cartoons?

Now, I’m off to watch episodes of Avatar: The Last Airbender on DVD. Anyone coming with me?

~Nicole S. Izmaylov

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I would like to thank Nicole for stepping in and writing the blog for me this time. She is an award winning author and both Nicole and her sister are people to be watching for in the very near future for even greater things.

The picture at the top is one of Nicole's books and can be found on Amazon.com  and Barnes and Noble

Michael

Yes Sir, I Am Still A Black Man.... and always will be.

This is the actually blog from one year ago. Since I wrote this my dear friend has died and I figure he has now found out if Jesus was a black man. He always told me that Jesus was black but I just assumed that Jesus was a Jew and most of the Jews I knew where not black.

My life has changed so much from that point in my life and it has been 100% for the better......




Today I saw that an old friend had called me, I have known him for many years but he is actually old. The guy was probably on the ark with Noah and is probably to blame for not tossing the skunk and the rat over board when Noah was not looking.

This man is a retired black preacher that adopted me as one of his grand kids. The interesting thing to me about our relationship is he believes in the "black gospel", a belief that black people are God's chosen people and whites are the cursed people of the Bible. This has never gotten in the way of our friendship because he thinks even a cursed white man can be saved and be a full brother in Christ.

I then called my dear friend to see what he wanted to talk about. He started off by telling me that he knew I have had a real rough 6 weeks or so but he had noticed that I was back to normal. This of course was a bit offensive because I would hate to be totally normal. He laughed and said no, normal for you.

We chatted about life and the mysteries of the world when he asked me a very strange question. He lowered his voice to almost a whisper and said "Micheal, son, are you still a black man?". Now this might seem like a strange thing to hear but this is the same guy who just a couple of weeks ago went on a long walk with me and after his fifth cigarette told me that walking was much better exercise then jogging because you cannot smoke while jogging.

I really did not know how to respond and my brain was slowly ticking down to exploding when he continued. He told me that I was his favorite grandson even though he only adopted me as his and that people needed to know that I was his kin. I really did not know what to say, I love Dean, Sinatra, my favorite ice cream is vanilla and I have blue eyes and I am of Swedish heritage.

The preacher continued by saying that blacks throughout history have been beaten, sold into slavery, denied jobs, could not even go to some businesses because of the color of their skin but they also created some of the most beautiful music, art and inventions that all people of every color could enjoy. He then explained that while there are people who hate me some for jealousy, some because of boredom that I should continue to be a black man and do what I knew in my heart was true and right.

He then asked me again if I was still a black man and I responded "Yes Sir, I am still a black man". There is much wisdom I have learned from this man and most of the time it takes me a long time to figure out exactly what I was supposed to learn but on this MLK day I can proudly proclaim that I am still a black man.... at least to my dear friend.

A Man Who Saw Today 30 Years Ago

Bill passed away in 2005, only having allowed his wife and daughter the pleasure of reading one of his writings.  When his widow recently was cleaning out drawers and boxes, she came across a box of his manuscripts.  She did not read them but asked if we would take a look at them.  These are but a small sampling of what that box contained. 


From the story "The Dupe" Out of the book "Watch Out For The Bicycles"

There are over 50 things in the book that has been found so far that matches up so very close to what is in the news today.

His name was Hussien Basharat Morton, a United States Senator from Illinois.
Barack Hussein Obama is the name of our President who was also a Senator from Illinois.


His wife, however, had a different way of thinking.  She could spend money like nobody else could.  He was sure that she was sitting downstairs drinking the most expensive champagne that money could buy and eating the most decadent of food and pastries.

CBSNEWS LINK


Hussein Basharat Morton might be an American but does he really have the heart and soul of America?



He asked the US if Morton leaned more toward other countries and if we was more interested in the Socialist dictators of the Middle East.

In his first Primary his toughest opponent was a Senator from New York whose name started with a "C". The New York Senator was brought into his Cabinet as well.

The Republican Party had become a replica of the Democratic Party, just with different leaders. Because of this, a new party was formed. It was splintered off of the Republicans. A true conservative, right winged group.

A man who was a member of The Sons of Liberty shoots at a politician 
He was known to those in the small town that he lived in as "the crazy one" -- "the lunatic". They said he was demented.


Link




There are many parallels in the story to things that are happening today. 

Bill left many notes because he was taking his short story and trying to flesh it out to a full book. 


This book with the short story "The Dupe" has sold well enough that we are going to try and take his notes and finish the long story. 


The top 5 people to find the best references in the short story to today's times will receive the new book when it is released. email your answers to michael@eternitymediapublications.com.


Kindle Edition    This is cheaper to do.
 




Paper Back

I Hate Mexicans

It is true that I hate Mexicans, Asians, Jews, Iranians, Arabs and a wonderful plethora of other people that God created. The lazy, dirty, thieving people that look like my neighbors, family and friends are just simply people that I cannot stomach. Maybe hate is to harsh of a word but a strong dislike might be more like it.

Now read carefully this part, I hate anyone that is dishonest and a threat to my safety and well being of my family. This includes people of all races, religions and creeds. I do NOT hate all Mexicans but the drug runners, murderers and other low lifes have reserved a place in my heart for spite. Every group of people have bad folk in them even white people (I can now hear the gasps). It is ok to despise evil doers of every race and also those close minded people who dislike a creation of God based solely on the fact of their color or place they were born.

It has become more apparent everyday that there are people who do not like someone because they are (fill in the blank) not because of actions but because of the color of their skin. These people who act like they are smarter then God are honestly the low life of civilization. These are the people who think that a Mexican is great as long as they mow their grass but they better not live in too nice a house or drive too nice a care all the while telling people how open minded and unprejudiced they are.

We all know that Mexicans should only clean houses, wash cars, cook our food but never be our boss. Arabs and Persians should only go around blowing people up, Jews should only be evil money grubbers and us white people should go around and be the best racist in the world... now when you actually say things like that it sounds stupid does it not?

Yes, there are Mexicans I hate but not because they are Mexican but instead because of whom they have chosen to be. There are Arabs that blow buildings and people up, there are Jews that put money above human life and there are white people that think that a white hood should be the fashion statement of the season... any season. Lets not become one of these people who characterize a whole group of people due to a few odd balls. Lets not look at a man with brown skin who speaks Spanish and wonder how he bought the expensive car because the chances are that he earned it through hard, smart and legal labor.

Know this.... you are the greatest low life if you look at someone and decide who they are because of the color of their skin....... If you are going to hate someone do so for who they chose to be and not who God chose them to be.

This blog was written because of a simple conversation I had last night. A Mexican can be hated because of what they have done but when you start treating a man of Mexican heritage differently (even slightly) because of the accent and color of skin then you personally have delved into the pit of slime called racism...... Can you hear me Drew :-)

I'm Dreaming of a White MLK Day

Let's get a few things out of the way. The US has a holiday to celebrate the ideas, hopes and aspirations of Martin Luther King Jr. this is not a so called black holiday but instead one that all people of all races can hold on to and hope for a better future. MLK was not a great man who was perfect but instead he was a man with great ideas that he tried to live up to and yet failed at just like the mere mortal that he was.

Now that we have that out of the way I would like to continue on with the blog.

I am currently living on the coast of Massachusetts and living through the second of the Nor'easters of the season.both occurring in the last couple of weeks. This has created a snow fall of about 40 inches in the last couple of weeks.

Since I have spent so much of my life in Southern California and even Oklahoma I am just not used to this kind of torrent of the white stuff. Shoveling everyday with mounds of snow 8 feet in the air was something I never thought much about till this winter. I am a tough guy but this does push the limits of sanity for me especially when you listen to the number of people who already question my sanity.

Since MLK day is approaching quickly I thought back to the others that I have lived through. Yes, there has been a few inches of snow but never a few feet of the white stuff. I then wondered why we do not have a song for the Holiday and I was inspired to borrow and change the Christmas carol and rename it "I'm Dreaming of a White MLK Day".

Crass you maybe thinking, but why would inserting a song about snow bother you. It is the middle of winter, it is New England and we are expecting more snow. Enjoy your MLK day but remember not the arguments about if he was a great man or a subversive communist instead remember his simple words (with deep meaning)


"Let freedom ring. And when this happens, and when we allow freedom ring—when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children—black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics—will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual: "Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"
I know that there will be some idiot that will try and get this blog removed because I quoted a man that used the term Negro..... get a life and maybe even try and understand what MLK was talking about.

Barefoot in the Snow

There is something about being a guy that means that we do things that women just do not seem to understand. I think going barefooted in the snow must be one because Judy just stares at me and shakes her head looking at me like I have suddenly lost all common sense and started growing horns out of my head as well.

I guess it is my Swedish blood and the cold does not bother me or maybe it means that I am the ultimate in lazy and I really do not want to take the time to put shoes on. I would like to make the point that while I do not wear shoes all the time that I am not a hippie because my feet are clean.

The first time that I remember going barefooted in the snow I was a child and was sick. I stayed at home from church with my younger brother who was sick as well. We were completely bored out of our heads and had my Dad set up a box on a stick with some bird seed underneath to see if we could catch a bird that came to eat.

The snow had piled up and it was really not a problem because the birds were hungry. We sat quietly by the window with the string edged through the door. When we could not wait any longer we yanked the string and as expected the birds all flew away.

Now, my father should have said that once the trap had been pulled that was it but he seems to have forgotten that one part. We reset the trap several times with the same results, the box would fall and the birds would scatter. This made my brother and I discuss what was wrong with the plan. Being boys who always solved whatever came our way. We realized that air resistance was helping to push the birds out from underneath the box.

We reset the trap (barefooted by the way) only we used a laundry basket and piled bricks on top to get the thing to fall with enough speed. It solved the problems we had before, no air resistance and enough weight to get the thing to fall.

Needless to say we caught 8-9 birds under the basket. We danced around the house high fiving one another until we realized that we now had a ton of birds but that the moment that we lifted the basket they would all fly away. Once again the brains that only a boy has we were able to come up with a solution, we would slide a piece of card board under the basket and bring our prizes inside.

The problem was that we had no cardboard but there was a small store a several blocks away so out the door we ran in pajama bottoms, t-shirts and no shoes. We did not feel the ice and snow between our toes because we were on a mission and could not let something stupid like shoes get in the way.

We finally got home with the cardboard and slid it under the basket. The plan worked perfect, we had the birds in the house and not a one got away. We proudly took them to our bedroom and what happened next is up for debate. Since this is my blog I am blaming my brother 100%, he knocked over the basket and the house now was filled with angry birds.

We started to panic and opened all the windows in the house and went around removing the screens so they could escape. Before we had succeeded at debirding the house my parents showed back up. They found my brother and I soaked from running barefooted, the windows all open, the screens removed and birds flying around the house....... needless to say they were not pleased.

If you know my parents then sometime you need to thank them for not becoming childless that day. I am not sure how I would handle it but thankfully my daughter is just that, a daughter. She is one of those people who just stares at me and thinks I am crazy.

Bulls Eye

 

Just about a year ago I started this simplistic and mind dulling blog. My readers have followed me through some very interesting events and strange times. The oddest thing I had happen just because I wrote this blog was the few times that I was overran by people who hated something I said. 

Things that seemed to set people off  was when I made fun of hippies, asked the question why someone would have 20+ piercings on their face and when I told my infamous stalker to leave me alone. The funny thing about the stalker is she and her 3 cohorts actually made comments on the blog with one swearing they have never visited my blog nor would they ever visit it yet they were mysteriously able to comment on the blog without ever visiting.

As I am returning to writing this blog I thought I would just run through a few of the facts about it......

This first year

253,431 visitors with almost 1 million pages viewed

43 countries

Top 10 Countries

1) USA

2) UK

3) India

4) Canada

5) Sweden

6) Germany

 7) Indonesia

8) Iran

9)Mexico

10) Australia 

50 states had people visit the blog

Top 10 Cities

1) Oklahoma City

2) Florence

3) Tulsa

4) New York City

5) Beverly

6) Los Angeles

7) Portland

8) Eugene

9) Jakarta

10) London

Interesting search results from Google

Vampire Smurf (first place under image search)

Dad's life and times (first place under search all)
Is there any babes in bikinis (6th place under search all)
A Jew, a Muslim and a Christian walk into a bar. (7th place under search all)
Squirrel Sausage (4th place under image and 5th place under search all)

I am tired of looking through the logs but you get the idea.... it has been one great year. This next year of musings should be just as interesting. I hope to have my friends, family and fans (ok, I probably have just one fan and I am married to her) continue with me on my journey through life.

Interested in squirrel sausage get the cookbook here.....Vile "Vittles" 

Proving to the world that I can see the future.

The Gorilla's Best Friend

March 17, 2010... I wrote this and look where I am today. You have to at least think it is odd.

The "400 Pound Gorilla" is getting married today, if you do not know who that is then you do not live anywhere close to the state of Oklahoma. I actually find this interesting for reasons I suppose most people do not. Ron is a great guy who I have admired for years. I would never speak ill of him because in a very strange way I own him so much.

Until about 7 years ago I never had much to do with any type of media or publishing, I actually stumbled into radio broadcasting purely on accident. Newspapers, political consulting, radio, Indie productions and even music events are all things that I have done but Ron went first. There is no competition between us because quite frankly I could not even come close to competing with him.

Ron is really about the only guy I know that I can ask my bizarre questions to and he does not flinch but gives a great answer. For instance, I asked him about the odds of a really ugly person running for office and what advice I should give them. Most people would be aghast that such a question was asked but Ron gave a great answer that solved a problem.

I always seem to be a year or two behind whatever Ron does, this does not bother me but instead lets me know what pitfalls lay ahead. He is like the scout in the old westerns that goes ahead of the group, gets shot up and makes it back to say "do not do what I just did". We even have daughters that are close to the same age but his girl is one grade ahead of mine. He is from the Pacific North West and moved to Oklahoma and I am from Oklahoma and moving to the Pacific North West.

Ron is a great guy but his Bride is even better. I honestly think she is one of the smartest, most talented and kindest people I have met on Facebook. The whole synopsis of this blog comes down to the Gorilla's girl. The thing I find fascinating about these two great people getting married is two words "best friends".

I have been screaming from the top of my lungs for the last month to everyone I know that if you are not married to your best friend then you are in trouble. I have had several people tell me how wrong I was but through some hard times I did discover that your best friend better be your spouse.

Ron over the last couple of months had mentioned that his Bride was his best friend. He became almost over protective of her but never mentioned that he had a romantic interest (publicly). When her status changed to in a relationship on FB I knew who it was with. They had done exactly what I myself had only recently discovered and that is best friends should be together for life.

The scary thing to me is that Ron is getting married today to his best friend. Since I seem to follow in his footsteps I guess I need to hurry up and find a best friend, any suggestions?

I want to say congratulations to two very kind and important people to me, Ron and Shawnnessy congratulations for finding and keeping your best friend.