What I Want For Christmas

So the year 2010 has brought me much joy and much sorrow.... actually very little sorrow but people will figure out I am egotist if I do not add the sorrow part. We all are collectively heading towards the greatest day of the year, Christmas. I know that some people will be upset and even lob threats at me for using such a vile word as Christmas but at this point in my life I think I can handle it. This makes me think of what a fully grown man would want on Christmas Day.

I assume I should say world peace, jobs for all or maybe Hollywood releasing one decent movie but actually I have given up on those fairy tales. This year I am going to be completely selfish, like that will surprise anyone. I am going to shoot for another monkey. PLEASE NOTE.... I did not say "shoot another monkey".

A young lady down the street gave me this fabulous prize seen in the above picture being modeled with my beautiful fiance and I think the boy is a little lonely. So if you are a bit strange, have a little money to spare then please mail me a live monkey quick. It would even be better if you could email me the live monkey because I would get it sooner.

If you have read this bizarre blog to the end I would love to send you a discount code to our books. This includes the new book that has everyone buzzing about what appears to be our current president but was written 30 years ago. Email me the request to fmcd2010@gmail.com