I Need A Racist Dictionary

I entered the wonderful world of Political Correctness and found it to be a lonely and confusing place. It started off innocently enough by just taking a break and meeting some friends for lunch, dinner, what ever that meal is you eat at 3 pm after  lunch but before the evening repast. My friends and I decided to stop for food in the hippie enclave of the Paseo District. My assumption has always been that if you wanted great munchies then head to where the hippies are because mysteriously they seem to have the munchies all the time.

In case you have never read any of my blog posts before then I should let you in on a secret, guys will be guys. We were talking about sports, women, politics and everything else that we know nothing about but try to sound like we do.The nice thing about being a guy is you can say the most outlandish thing to your friends and they will not buy one word of what you are saying but they will add on to it to make it even more of a fantastical tale. (this only works if people are in on the joke, the fisherman's tale for example).

We were talking about the weather, in Oklahoma that is an important subject. We have tornadoes that seem to aim straight at mobile home parks. If I lived in a mobile home I would be upset with people who call tornadoes an "act of God". That would make it appear that God really does hate people who live in trailer parks.

As you can imagine we were having a good time when our waitress came up to our table and explained that some of the other customers were upset with things we were saying. We looked around and the only people we saw were ones that offended me because of their smell. We questioned the nice tattooed on the face lady about what we had said that was offensive. She shrugged her shoulders so we pushed a little more. She finally broke the news to us that the term "snowman" was a derogatory term.

Ok, not sure about snowman being a bad word so I had to ask what it meant and who was it meant to be bad for. The lovely young lady that had so much metal in her face that she looked as though she were shot by a shot gun at close range said that it was not her job to educate us. She then explained that we should just know all the racist terms and should be ashamed if we ever used them.

This made me realize that I am truly ignorant, I need help learning all of the hep and cool racist lingo so I can avoid them. I need a very educated racist to make me a dictionary so I can learn what not to say. I did check Google and found that snowman was a derogatory term used primarily for people of Scandinavian linage and people of the Himalayan areas, it is not a popular term but is used by some.

I am Swedish so I want to make it clear SNOWMAN is OUR word  and you cannot use it. If you use it then it will mean you are racist if I use it then I am just trying to take the sting out of the word.....  the wonderful world of Political Correctness is a lonely and confusing place to be.